Haiku Hurricane

Dear E,

I’m glad you had so much fun in England! Your trip seems like it was lovely. Also, mumsey’s style gets two thumbs up from me. That was one killer outfit.

So I’m looking back through our texts and thinking, how are we so awesome? Seriously though, I’m pretty sure only we could have a conversation made of haikus. It all started out with me talking about how it’s so hot that I sleep with a fan in my bed, right next to my face.

I don’t need no man

I’m so hot I need this fan

God damn it god damn.


I don’t need no man

I cuddle with my damn fan

Right next to my face.


Then E told me about how she passed a building called ‘Frank Fickett Scout training and Supplies’

Frank Fickett trained scouts

Frankie didn’t piss around

Now go buy supplies.


Then we just got on a haiku roll and started churning the haikus out.

E is my best friend.

Thank my lucky stars I met

My sister soulmate.


Friendship is so true

Unmatched by other forces

Sure as the sunrise.


Brown, sweet, dark, milk, white.

I eat chocolate like a drug.

No regrets bitches.


When I write haikus

I feel so Japan-ese-ey

And that’s pretty cool.


I was wearing cool pants that day so I wrote this one:

I’m wearing cool pants

Nothing’s gonna bring me down

Not with these pants on


but then I decided to change it to this:

I’m wearing chic pants

Feeling groovy, looking good

You can’t bring me down.


E wrote this gem, although love-rife might be a stretch

E and P love-rife

E and P through gall and strife

E and P for life.


E and P love life,

Kicking ass and taking names,

Prepare yourself, world.


E and P-best friends

Live laugh love, that’s our motto

Big dreams, bigger hearts.


This bus ride is long

Sweat running down my armpits

Stranger leans on me.


We then proceeded to talk about pathetic fallacy for a few texts and then these haikus popped out.

E, P, and wiki

We make the ultimate team

We’re unstoppable.


Haikus are dope yo

I enjoy thinking them up.

Bustin out lines, what.


We get better by

The minute; ain’t nobody

got nothin on us.


Swaggerific lines

Got the rhythm and the flow

Fresh, fly, caint touch dis.


Cracker Barrel roads

Texas highways forever

Never ending stretch.


Duolingo time

Learning languages is fun

Spanish is lovely


I’ll tell you this much

Learning to code by yourself

Is extremely hard.


There were a lot of texts in between but there’s all the haikus we wrote. We’re a couple of poetic geniuses, nbd.

Miss you E and we should definitely get on that Skype date!

Much love,



Go England!


Dear P,

Happy twelfth day of being alive, Baby George! I am so glad you were born healthy and happy. Royal babies always make me slightly nervous; the royal family married their cousins for so many generations.

According to my schedule (pronounced shedule) baby George was supposed to be born about two weeks before he actually was. That’s when I was in England:

Having tea:



(Mumsey eating a scone)


Visiting the houses of famous Brits, like Winston Churchill and Vita Sackville-West:



I took a picture of these sandals because I thought these are exactly what you would wear if you lived in Edwardian England, P.


These are sock puppets of Virginia Woolf and Vita. While I was in the UK, I read Woolf’s “Orlando”. It was a very interesting novel inspired by Vita Sackville-West.


Feel free to revel in how fabulous Mumsey is. You should write a Flashin’ Fashion about her, P.


We also toured around London:




And the cliffs of Dover:





All in all, it was an amazing trip. I went to receive the Duke of Edinburgh award, which I began my sophomore year when I was a student at Malvern College. When you finally get your D of E award, after two fifty-mile expeditions, much volunteering, and the absorption of a new skill set (for me, rock-climbing and painting with oil colors), it is presented in St. Jame’s palace by the Duke of Edinburgh himself, Prince Phillip. It was a pretty cool deal, and I’m glad I went. You can only enter St. Jame’s palace under invitation from the royal family; I felt like a secret American spy. St. Jame’s palace was spectacular, but I wasn’t allowed to take any pictures of the regal red staircase, the sextet that played as we entered, or the impressive portrait of Admiral Nelson I faced during the presentation.



Love you loads, P! You should post those haikus that we wrote- mine got deleted off my phone accidentally. I hope Cope Cod was fun. We should skype soon.

Hugs and kisses,