New Year

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Dear E,

Your journal posts totally rock. Keep journaling awesome things, because as we know, the things you journal often happen in real life.

I tried to add pictures to my last post but for some reason it just wasn’t happening. I guess I’ll have to do a post of just pictures from Hawaii at the end of my trip 🙂

I really miss you too. Yesterday, at one of the beaches we were at there was completely black sand and the water was really gray and kept crashing around us really hard and making white waves and we were surrounded by black rocks. The sun went away for a little bit and I jokingly was like “Gosh, this is such a literary beach.” Needless to say my brothers just stared at me blankly. I think you’re the only person who knows the difference between a literary beach and a vacation beach. I miss you as my traveling bud.

Anyway, this post isn’t about Hawaii, I’ll update you more about that tomorrow. This post is actually about the new year. As we all know it’s kind of a tradition to make New Years Resolutions and for those who are so inclined, you wrote an extremely lovely post with brilliant ideas on how to make the new year bigger, badder, and better. I wanted to do a post about a kind of alternate way to start off the new year.

I’ve been looking through my journals from last year and the resolutions I made last year. Some of them I actually kept and some I didn’t. I feel like this year was kind of stagnant for me. I turned 19, which frankly, is pretty boring. I started my sophomore year at MIT, which supposedly, is the worst year ever. I spent my summer doing research for god’s sake. 2013 was not a big year in the life of P. But that’s okay, because 2012 was one of the most epic years of my life, and I can kind of feel in my bones that 2014 is going to be amazing.

I think with 2013 as a whole, I’m happy with the small things. I spent lots of quality time with the people I love the most: my family, my friends, you, etc. I ate a lot of really good food, I did some traveling, I met new people. I learned what it feels like to give it everything you can and still fail. I learned to love myself not for who I could be, but for who I am right now. I know what I want more than anything in the world. I’m a girl who loves the wind in her hair, the sun on her back, and the feeling of adventure coursing through her veins. I can’t sum up the whole year in a single post. I couldn’t do it if I had an entire book. It’s a sum of all those fractured little pieces that pervade my memories: a pregame with a roomful of my favorite girls, laughing in the study until I’m literally on the ground, roomie talks at 4 am, exploring Boston and Austin, and other magical places….it’s a million little things.

This year I’m not going to make any New Years Resolutions. I talked about this with K. I always overcommit myself and I try to fix ALL of the things and make myself perfect. Even one of my new years resolutions from last year would be enough to keep a sane person busy for an entire year. Instead of making a laundry list of things to strive for I’m picking three words that I want to embody all year, and hopefully for the rest of my life. It’s easy to remember three words. The hard part is trying to embody the three words. You can’t measure it in a moment or with numbers or a certain achievement. I guess I’ll just have to take a look at myself at the end of 2014 and decide for myself whether I was successful.

So without further ado, the three words that I’m choosing:

passionate

disciplined

happy

I’m not going to go into details on why I chose those three words or what they mean to me, but if you’re looking for an alternative to new years resolutions I think this is a good idea.

I hope everyone tonight gets to drink a lot of bubbly and kiss their love when the clock strikes midnight.

Hugs and Kisses,

P

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